TL;DR (Too Long Didn’t React)
Acknowledging our attention and intentions.
OK, we all know what happens here, you see that little “…See More” at the end of a Facebook post, an omitted section of text that is begrudgingly painful to click with the tip of your finger and is passed on for the picture of someone’s cute pet or snarky comment that you can identify with. As some of you already know “TL;DR” usually means “Too Long Didn’t Read” which is used to comment on something on social media. It essentially expresses an expectation to be entertained without needing to pay attention or think. Our surprise at the astounding number of paragraphs after we click that “…See More” which is usually followed by an eye roll, and is immediately dismissed because it doesn’t align with our immediate need for satisfaction. Oh, and let’s not forget “turn off notifications for this post.” Why would we want to be reminded of what we tell ourselves we already know? I gave the thumbs up, the hug reaction, and the heart! What more do you want?!!
Sound familiar?
I moved to this platform because I needed to liberate myself from that abbreviation. I’ll admit it triggered me in the past, and quite frankly, I hate it so much that I checked if it was trademarked. What if I owned those four little letters that are essentially my passive view on what could be important information? What if I could monetize on our own need for comfortability in the endless feed of unnecessary bullshit? I could be rich and sue everyone! This is genius!
Oh wait…it’s not genius at all. I’ve actually been doing this to myself EVERY DAY.
I trademarked “TL;DR” a long time ago and just didn’t know it. It became a strategy in my mind to deal with the adverse affects of my past traumas, numbing myself, finding unhealthy distractions, getting attention, avoiding taking responsibility for my own decisions and staying in my own comfort zone. Just like it is so easy to type those four little letters, our “monetization” of avoidance is paying off for the short term, because we really don’t want to face some hard truths about ourselves — and that is what we might read if we click “…See More.” I use this metaphor because I see a hidden parallel within myself when I think of social media, the mindless act of scrolling our news feed (our own emotions perhaps?), and sometimes even the ambiguity of every day living. What is it we think when our friends don’t reply to our texts? What do we think of ourselves when the person we loved no longer loves us. The question is: How do you interpret those situations? Do you take everything personally or do you consider that it’s more likely that your friend is just busy, having a bad day, or perhaps there is something about ourselves that pushed away our ex-relationship. Our own “TL;DR” rears its head in our brains and files a trademark lawsuit against our consciousness in which we can’t pay up because we didn’t give ourselves permission to look inward. So we sometimes believe that our own life is entirely under the control of forces outside one’s self, such as fate, luck or the mercy of other people. But it’s not. Is life always fair? NO. But it’s how you react beyond the proverbial click of your finger to which you can figure out what is worth reading inside your own head. And come to find out, what you may WANT to read or scroll just may be a page in your own book that you haven’t written yet.
I know there is another caveat here…we can’t help but digest what is happening in the world today and sometimes our need for information (and action) is crucial to our well being. But what is even more crucial is how we digest and interpret that information and how we can manage our attention and intentions when we feel we can’t avoid it. I say the word “feel” because it’s our own emotions that are making the decisions for us. We’ve been conditioned since birth to become the person who we are today, from our parents, siblings, classmates, relationships and our use of social media is all conditioning us to exert an emotion upon our own brains which will translate to our decisions in the future. Do you want to just surrender to that? or do you want to take control?
If you would like your life to be better, you are still seeking the liberation from those conditions. If you want freedom from the things that shackle you, the things in your environment, the sights, the sounds, the people, the news…they are all pushing your “…See More” button, causing a chain reaction that governs your behavior in some ways that can be unfortunate unless you start paying attention to what is going on inside your head. Those “paragraphs” (or self-narrative) you unconsciously exposed may not be what you should be reading right now, but you may have to anyway. Your brain is designed to respond in reflexive fashion to what is being put upon it. Its design since you were a small child is to be controlled by the input that you give it and what was given to you. If you turn to the natural, almost instinctive feelings of comfortability, the impulse to avert those unpleasant feelings, you will continue to be controlled by the world around you. But if you observe those feelings mindfully, rather than just reacting to them you can eventually escape that control. The causes that ordinarily shape your behavior can be defied and you can get further away from being a byproduct of your own conditioning.
So ask yourself…if this wasn’t too long for you to read, how far are you willing to go to write your own story for you and you only. I know I’m not here for your reaction, I just want you to be aware of yours after you read this. I just may have to trademark “Too Long; Didn’t React” instead.
This article is a supplement to my Instagram posts as a form of reflection and journaling. As you may have noticed, my choice in audiobooks have been digging deeper into the brain, its functioning, and some Buddhist philosophies (more coming soon!). I write these articles to invoke an idea in yourself, give an insight to what I’m reading (listening to) right now, and perhaps help propel you into your own decision through unconventional metaphors and sometimes humor. I know most articles are meant for tips on this and that, but personally I believe this is more tangible to the people that I share it with cause you know me personally. Sometimes the value can be brought through true connection and conversation rather than just through someone who you don’t know, so enjoy…your feedback is welcome. Feel free to follow me on Instagram @thedoubledmke for more, my posts are intentionally insightful and never mundane. Thank you.
Audiobooks from upper left to right:
Left Image:
“The Molecule of More” By: Daniel Z. Lieberman MD, Michael E. Long
“The Body Keeps The Score” By: Bessel van der Kolk
“Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender” By: David R. Hawkins
“No Self, No Problem: How Neuropsychology Is Catching Up to Buddhism” By: Chris Niebauer
Right Image:
“Livewired” By: David Eagleman
“Attached” By: Amir Levine and Rachel S. F. Heller
“The Achievement Habit: Stop Wishing, Start Doing, and Take Command of Your Life” By: Bernard Roth
“Mindsight” By: Daniel J. Siegel
